Dating can feel like an overwhelming and daunting process. But with the right approach, online dating can be a fantastic way to meet new people and find love.
Whether you’re looking for a casual hookup or a committed relationship, it’s important to know your goals before you start. Follow these tips for a more enjoyable, successful experience.
1. Know What You Want
When it comes to casual dating, there are a few things you need to know before going on your first date. This can help ensure that you don’t end up disappointed in the experience and it will also help you avoid any misunderstandings with your date once you get together.
You should also consider how much of a commitment you want from the relationship before getting too involved with someone. Keeping this in mind can help you decide whether or not casual dating is right for you.
The pros of casual dating are that it gives you a chance to see how well you connect with a person without having to make a commitment or feel like you need to be married or engaged before meeting them. In addition, it can give you a sense of what you want in your future partner, says certified relationship coach and matchmaker Dr. Casandra Henriquez.
Another pro of casual dating is that it can save you a lot of time and energy, which means that you can be more selective in your dating choices. This can be especially useful if you’re busy with work or family responsibilities and have no time to meet new people.
However, you should remember that casual relationships don’t always come with the same level of maturity as committed ones, so it’s important to respect your partner’s needs and boundaries in a casual relationship. This includes how often you see each other and the way that you engage in sex and physical intimacy.
It’s also important to keep in mind that, just like in a committed relationship, you have the right to communicate with your casual partner if you feel something isn’t working out. This can include if you don’t feel comfortable spending a significant amount of time with them or if you don’t want to spend any more time with them at all.
You should also be respectful if you decide to break up with your casual partner. This is especially important if you don’t feel that the relationship is working for you. This is important because ghosting a casual partner can be incredibly hurtful and can lead to feelings of loneliness, depression, and hopelessness.
2. Look for Red Flags
If you’re looking for casual online dating, it’s important to be able to spot the red flags that may indicate a shady person. But it’s also critical to know your own preferences and what you’re looking for in a partner before diving in head first.
A red flag can be a simple habit that you’d never consider a deal breaker, like the way they cut their toenails in bed or leave dirty dishes on the sink, but if you notice these habits happening often or over time, it could be an indicator of something else.
It might not be as obvious, but someone who isn’t willing to put in any effort for you to get to know them on a deeper level can also be a big red flag. According to dating psychologist Madeleine Mason Roantree, it’s a sign that the person doesn’t care about you or doesn’t have a strong desire to build a relationship with you.
Another red flag is a tendency to hide things from you. This could be as simple as not having many pictures or using a masking app like TikTok. It can also mean they aren’t very talkative or not expressing themselves.
You might also see endless bathroom and gym selfies that make you wonder why they don’t smile more often. These photos can be a big red flag because they show that the person is self-impressed and narcissistic, says Rubin.
In addition, if the person you’re dating has been using their profile to catfish you, it can be a red flag as well. It’s important to check with your friends and family, too, to confirm the person is who they say they are before you jump into a relationship.
If you feel like your relationship is heading in a direction that you don’t want, it’s helpful to seek out support from a therapist. ReGain has a wide variety of highly qualified, licensed therapists who can help you navigate your relationship in a safe and supportive manner.
The most important thing to remember is that relationships are about working together to support one another in the best way possible, but it’s also crucial to recognize when you and your partner aren’t working well together. Identifying this early on can prevent unnecessary conflict in the future.
3. Keep It Casual
Casual dating is a popular way to meet new people without the pressure of committing to a long-term relationship. It can be used for any number of reasons, such as experimenting with sexuality, being friends with benefits, or just looking for fun and connection.
Often, casual relationships aren’t exclusive, which can raise the risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections (STIs). If you’re dating someone who isn’t ready to be committed, you should discuss your expectations and boundaries with them before you go too far.
Some people don’t communicate clearly when they date casually, which can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. This is especially true if both partners aren’t sure what they want from the relationship or are prone to co-dependence and insecurity.
Many people also have limiting beliefs about dating or relationships in general, so this can make it hard to have fun in casual relationships. Talking to a therapist or mental health professional can help you overcome those limiting beliefs and find ways to enjoy casual dating again.
It’s not uncommon for people who are in casual relationships to develop a crush, but this shouldn’t be the case with every person you date. This is not a normal part of casual dating, and it can be a sign that you’re on the wrong track or that your partner doesn’t understand what you’re looking for.
If you start to catch romantic feelings with a casual online dating partner, it’s important to keep your distance and let them know that it’s not something that’s meant to last forever. This can be difficult, but it’s essential to protect yourself from getting into a toxic relationship.
When you’re in a casual relationship, there aren’t any rules that define what’s OK and what’s not. This can cause a lot of confusion and misunderstandings, says love coach Francesca Hogi.
For example, it’s not okay to be jealous of a casual partner if they have a boyfriend or girlfriend or spend time with friends. If you’re having a hard time controlling your jealousy, it might be a sign that you need to take a break from casual dating.
4. Don’t Overthink It
If you have a tendency to overthink things, especially in romantic relationships, it can be detrimental. It can keep you from enjoying yourself and finding the intimacy and love you deserve. Overthinking is also exhausting and can be damaging to your health.
The key to avoiding overthinking in casual online dating is to be honest and upfront about what you want from the relationship. This can help you avoid misunderstandings that can cause unnecessary tension.
In addition, be open about your expectations, as well as how much time and money you expect to spend on a casual relationship. If you’re not on the same page about your expectations, then it will be difficult to work out what will and won’t work for the two of you.
It’s also important to not be too critical of your partner when they are unsure about their intentions. It’s normal to have concerns about a potential casual online dating partner, and it’s a good idea to give them the space they need to decide whether or not this is right for them.
Similarly, if you feel pressured by your casual online dating partner to get more serious, or you find them too controlling, it’s probably a sign that this is not the right fit for you. You might be falling in love with them, or you might be agreeing to things that you don’t really want just to hold onto them.
If you’re not sure about how to handle the casualness of your relationship, you might want to seek professional advice from a therapist or qualified mental health expert. This person will be able to help you understand the issues that may be causing your overthinking and how to break this habit in a healthy way.
Finally, if you find yourself reverting to past hurts in your relationship or asking people for advice about your feelings more often than is helpful, this might be a sign that you are overthinking. It can also be a sign that you aren’t trusting your partner or you aren’t feeling vulnerable enough to let them know how you feel.
